Back, not for good.
I haven't blogged for ages, realised the lat time was the end of May.
about me going to cologne, germany the other time.
Tonite, i am back on this blog, because of how i feel again.
Emo.
I hate this feeling.
Life has beenr eally busy for me, and i think it is a good and bad thing.
Also in a crazy twirl of fate, i got myself attached, for almost 2 months now.
itss a long distance relationship, that i have devoted myself into a hundred and one percent.
i don noe why, but meeting him, jus feels like everything is alright.
the warm fuzzy feeling inside.
The chemistry, the sparks and the kiss.. unforgettable.
With him, there are good and bad.
The good is of course the love that i feel.
the fact that i noe there is someone there for me.
The bad is of course the physical absence.
and i do feel lousy at times, when i realised how wonderful a person he is.
in 5 days time, i will be onboard a plane again
off to sydney this time to meet my love
mixed feelings, mixed emotions.
there are so much to do,
and so much to think about.
and i don even remember i made this decision to travel miles to meet him for 10days.
I choose to beleive it will be all worth it.
Time flies.
i am 7motnhs into my job, and so much have changed,
from where i started to where i am now.
good and bad too.
Life is filled wit good and bad for me.
work, family, frens and love.
there are the positives and the negatives in every aspect of my lifes now, and like usual, the battle between them is tearing me apart.. inside..
every nite, i tire myself out b4 putting my head on my pillow, so that i can sleep wit ease.
almost everynite, we will be on the phone, with him kissing me to sleep.
tonite, we didn't chat till i fall asleep, and damn, my emotions got the better of me.
haiz, this feeling i have now, is soooo sucky..
i can't control it.
i laugh, i cry and anger at the slightest happenings in me.
thats how i feel.
i feel so vunerable emotionally now.
and i hate this feeling so much.
i hate loosing control of my feelings.
I hope venting all these out will make me better and stronger.
i need to reflect, and control.
i need to wake up.
i need to find myself back.
200909, SUN, 0316hrs
about me going to cologne, germany the other time.
Tonite, i am back on this blog, because of how i feel again.
Emo.
I hate this feeling.
Life has beenr eally busy for me, and i think it is a good and bad thing.
Also in a crazy twirl of fate, i got myself attached, for almost 2 months now.
itss a long distance relationship, that i have devoted myself into a hundred and one percent.
i don noe why, but meeting him, jus feels like everything is alright.
the warm fuzzy feeling inside.
The chemistry, the sparks and the kiss.. unforgettable.
With him, there are good and bad.
The good is of course the love that i feel.
the fact that i noe there is someone there for me.
The bad is of course the physical absence.
and i do feel lousy at times, when i realised how wonderful a person he is.
in 5 days time, i will be onboard a plane again
off to sydney this time to meet my love
mixed feelings, mixed emotions.
there are so much to do,
and so much to think about.
and i don even remember i made this decision to travel miles to meet him for 10days.
I choose to beleive it will be all worth it.
Time flies.
i am 7motnhs into my job, and so much have changed,
from where i started to where i am now.
good and bad too.
Life is filled wit good and bad for me.
work, family, frens and love.
there are the positives and the negatives in every aspect of my lifes now, and like usual, the battle between them is tearing me apart.. inside..
every nite, i tire myself out b4 putting my head on my pillow, so that i can sleep wit ease.
almost everynite, we will be on the phone, with him kissing me to sleep.
tonite, we didn't chat till i fall asleep, and damn, my emotions got the better of me.
haiz, this feeling i have now, is soooo sucky..
i can't control it.
i laugh, i cry and anger at the slightest happenings in me.
thats how i feel.
i feel so vunerable emotionally now.
and i hate this feeling so much.
i hate loosing control of my feelings.
I hope venting all these out will make me better and stronger.
i need to reflect, and control.
i need to wake up.
i need to find myself back.
200909, SUN, 0316hrs
posted by SunShine at 11:55 AM
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