AH MA, You took a part of me when you left, I Love You.

My grandma passed away today.

exactly 7 months, and 1 day after my dad did..

Withing the time frama of a year, i lost 2 of my closest family members.

I wonder how i can cope with this.

the feeling of numbness.

the feeling of heart wrench.

the pain of not being able to think properly.

the need to be comforted.

the brave front that has to be put up.

the life that has to be carried on.

As i type along, i realised, i have so much to say, but i don noe how to do it.

Maybe jus a few things tt is in my head now.

I remember how i use to ask for money from Ah ma, to buy all sorts of cards when i was young, and she never said no.

I remember how she always bring me around, afraid of me travelling alone.

That includes to my music class, my IT classes, My abacus classes, my auntie's place, etc....

and then during my class, she always sits outside, and jus wait for me, till my lesson ends, then she will bring me home.

Ah Ma is the Most patient person i ever knew.. the MOST Patient person ever in my life.

I remember how Ah Ma got so angry at me once, and she slapped me. cause i fought wit my cousin, and i scolded vulgaraties at my cousin. that was the only time AH Ma was angry at me.

But i noe she is very sad when she hit me.

I remember how i was always so scared to go to the toilet at nite, and i will always call her to wait for me outside the toilet when i was young.

I remember her porridge that she will always cook, every SUN morning.

I remember how she will ALWAYS ask me if i wan Milo in the morning when i wake up, then she will make it for me.

I remember how she will ALWAYS ask if i have clothes to be iron, when she noes i am going out.

I remember how she will ALWAYS ask me wat time i wan to wake up the next day, and she will endlessly try to wake me up, despite how cranky i get when i am awoken in the morning, and i will get angry at her. shame on me.

I remember how she will always try to end my call from Australia ASAP whenever i call, despite the fact that i noe she misses me like crazy. reason being, she doesn't wan me to waste money on overseas call, as she thinks its very expensive. but, talking to her, was priceless.

As i stay home, i can't help but tear when i enter her room, look at her clothes, and also the photos she had.
Its gonna take me a real long time.
To be the me, i use to be.
Enough of unfortunate events for me.
Pls, stop torturing me.





0018hrs, 130209, FRI