i'M BaCk!!!!!!!!

Hey.. haven updated this thingy for so long.. haha..
SSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO mMMMAAAAAANNNNNYYYYYYYYYY THIngs have happened and i jus don have the chance to update this thing.. haha..
cause no computer at home ma.. sadddddddddddddd....
ok where shall i start..
hmmm 1st and foremost, OPERA has finally ended.. its one long journey and thank god CIE survived.. haha..got so many things happen.. but jus look on the bright side and say that no matter wat happens, CIE has becomed much united and we happen to talk to each other more already.. Yeah.. and get to noe the new guys better oso.. and get to noe the voluntary and reservists better too.. everyone was supportive and i luv the bond.. though the music part sux.. i must say we tried our very best during the final showdown.. 18 gruesome rehearsals and its all down to two long days of performance at victorai theatre.. ok lar.. we all feel proud of ourselves i must say.. but every happy ending comes with some regrets lar..
Hmmm.. one of the closet cik has ORD already.. ok not oficially but opera is his last show wit us.. and guess i'm the one of the few that is really upset over this lar.. for many reasongs. many which maybe i shouldn;t talk about or will make things more complicated??
HAIZ!!!!!!! WHY MUST HE GO??? all i could think about was him for the past few days..
really upset.. until now.. haiz... WHY must everything come to an end.. the moivation for me to come for camp.. the motivation for me to keep CIE going.. haiz.. i really hate all the work i have to do now since he is gone.. but everytime when he ask, i must say everything is fine cause i really don wan him to worry and i don wan him to be disappointed wit me.. issit worth it for me to do all this?? i really don noe.. but if he wans me to do more, i would still do it.. i jus feel helpless against him...haiz.. i've met my match.. someone wit more confidence.. more charisma.. and a bigger heart...
OK.. this blog is not suppose to be bout him onli.. but i really can;t help it.. there is no one i can talk to bout this too.. its jus too sensitive.. and who really understands???
HAIZ>>>>
I jus wanna scream out loud.. i need a break... and i wan him so badly.. so badly it hurts inside.. i feel so possesive.. i feel so selfish.. but who isn"T!!! everybody wans something in life.. and i guessi had found mine.. but its not possiblee. i jus can;t make it happen.. i'm helpless.. haiz.. i jus wanna go home and rest now.. i will continue my blog some other time..
Sorry ppl for this emo posting.. i jus can;t help it...